Many things in life still trigger my anxiety and insecurity but the biggest trigger is when someone says, “You are so self-conscious.” It triggers the thought of where did this all started. In recent years, I have been struggling sudden weight gains. Yes, a common problem to many “normal” people, and I look skinny to majority of people. Oh yeah, I can work on it if I dislike that much, right?
Being skinny or having a great body shape used to triumphed the feeling that I get when I get called names.
People may just easily say, “You are pretty,” “Be more confident,” “Don’t care about other people’s opinions,” or “Look at me I have the same problem, too!”
YOU DON’T GET IT!!! I wish there was stronger and more concise expression to say what I feel. AND DON’T You dare compare this to someone who gets plastic surgery to get bigger breasts! Please tell me if you were sexually assaulted because of your looks. THEN only then I may agree that you know how I feel. Your superficial judgement may say I’m self-conscious and worry about little things but you do not know the horrors I went through for being who I am.
It’s incompatible.
Despite being occasionally haunted by thoughts and feelings… what seems to have me smile still and be CONFIDENT as I am THEN and NOW is a genuine comment from someone who truly cares: “I like you then and now, with or without.”
Today’s post goes to not only people affected by facial disorders but to all of us who struggle with ourselves and being true ourselves yet affected by people who are inexperienced life, not enough know that their experience and situation may not be the same and throwing so called harmless comments.
Alright, new parents grab the book tonight for your children, “I love you through and through”- I think that’s the title. My favorite. I will admit I almost cried when I was reading it to a kid that I was babysitting.
Yours Truly,
Sarah, Simply Just Mine <3
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